I am not sure of the origin of this article, but I came across it in a free publication called the Crab Line, which is available in the North Norfolk region. I enjoyed reading the article and thought that lots of others would too, so with suitable acknowledgement to the anonymous author, here goes......
Mr. & Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband go with her to Walmart, but he gets bored, he prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse.
Here's a letter sent to Mrs. Fenton:
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.
Things Mr. Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:
June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
September14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
December 6: In the auto department practised his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the foetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
And last, but not least.....
December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
Regards,
Walmart
Mr. & Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband go with her to Walmart, but he gets bored, he prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse.
Here's a letter sent to Mrs. Fenton:
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.
Things Mr. Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:
June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
September14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
December 6: In the auto department practised his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the foetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
And last, but not least.....
December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
Regards,
Walmart
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